Today while at Walmart I was greeted by none other than Chewbacca. This story is so unbelievable that I can't believe it myself. I'm in Walmart looking at nail polish and this very tall woman comes over to me and starts talking. She told me I was very pretty then she proceeded to say "I don't want to offend you but women of color should not wear red lipstick because it makes us look cheap". She went on to say that women of color (is that the new label for us now?) should not wear colored eyeshadow because that makes us look cheap as well. Uh, can you say shocked? I was so shocked by what was coming from the woman's mouth. But wait! she didn't stop there. She just had to take it to next level and show me how to put on makeup. She tells me that she is wearing her everyday look which is her "sultry neutral eye" (it looked more like sucker with a ugly eye to me). How many Youtube videos do you have to watch to start referring to your makeup as sultry? Who the hell says sultry neutral eye? Alrighty then. She goes on to tell me every color she used and where she cut the crease. Do people really walk around saying that? Then she leans over to show me her sultry neutral eye (this is where it gets scary). Wait, what's that? Is that a mustache? Yup. Is that a uni-brow? Yup. I knew it looked familiar, it's Chewbacca in the flesh! I don't believe it! This chick with a mustache and a uni-brow is giving makeup lessons. But wait there is more, as she leans in closer I noticed her skin is a scary shade of gray. I have heard of a lighter shade of pale but a deader shade of gray now that's a new one to me. As I'm staring at this beast I'm wondering which would I prefer to look like dead or cheap, dead or cheap, dead or cheap that's a tough one (let me get back to you on this one).

I'm standing there in shock and trying very hard not to laugh in her face mainly because the beast looks like she is 6ft tall and I know when to pick my battles. Fighting a monster is just not smart. Then again I could punch her in the Adams apple and run before she can catch her breathe but what if she really is an animal and it backfires? Nah, I'll wait for the perfect moment to escape. The more she talked the more I wanted to laugh but it's not wise to offend the beast so I stand there and hold my breathe hoping that someone will come by with a big bag of dog food and save me. Next thing you know I hear someone say "run Forest run" that's me so I took off. Maybe I was hallucinating from holding my breathe so long or maybe I wasn't.

In her defense I was wearing some really red lip gloss and it was really red. My lips looked like I should be on a corner saying "hey Joe you wanna give a go". The lip gloss was too much for that early in the morning. But come on, going up to a complete stranger and pretty much calling them cheap and trying to get them to conform to your way of thinking is just tacky. This brings me back to something that I am always saying to my husband and kids. Please don't let me go out of the house looking a mess. If I look bad please tell me. Someone should have told this woman that she looks like Chewbacca and that her skin is gray and the mustache and uni-brow makes her look like a beast. I'm guessing that someone told this lady that she looked great rather than take a chance at hurting her feelings. So now we have this creature passing along makeup tips on how to look like Chewbacca and scaring the children.

I see people all the time with makeup styles that I would never wear but that doesn't make their style wrong and mine right. It means that we have different styles in makeup and that's it. I think its sad when I see people being herded like livestock into what is supposed to be normal. If there is a time when a person should say "fight the power" this should be it. It's unfortunate that its today's society when everyone is struggling so hard to fit in that those of us that go against the grain are consider cheap and weird. Just for the record please do not call me cheap or weird I prefer to be called crazy. For all of you that think wearing visible makeup, heavy makeup, Goth makeup, or anything other than neutral makes a person weird just know that that you are so neutral that no one notices you, unless you are Chewbacca with a hairy back and big mouth. I refused to be simulated into the norm and resistance is not futile. I'm going to wear my red lip stick, my blue eyeshadow and whatever else I can get my hands on. As long as I am free to chose then I chose to be me. Even if the revolution will not be televised please fight for your right to look like a cheap weirdo.